Links for the rejected:

Employer: Where was that resume I told you to file? Can you bring it back with three additional copies? Employee: Oh, I am sorry. I thought when you said to file it, you meant throw it in the trash like always. Employer: Ah who am I kidding! We were just gonna hire someone else anyway. The janitor told me about his nephew, who has a computer.

And the letter reads:

Dear XOXOX,

Thank you for considering a career with Carolinas HealthCare System and allowing us the opportunity to review your application. The qualifications you have submitted will be reviewed in relation to our current openings. Once a position is found that matches your career interests and qualifications, we will contact you to discuss the opportunity.

Thank you again for your interest in Carolinas HealthCare System.

Best wishes in your career search.

*** NOTE: This is an automatically generated message; please do not reply as these messages will not be seen by Human Resources staff.